The king trumps the queen - now what?

Remember the days when couples had separate rooms or beds? I never thought I'd be one of "those" couples but I'm afraid it may be in my immediate future. Let me explain.

I love my husband. I love "private" time with him but when it comes time to sleep - neither of us are touchy, cuddly people. That's for awake time. This is why we bought a king size bed when we bought our home. We wanted room for each to be comfortable and also room for our, at that time, child to be in bed too. Great. However, upon getting the bed home and after sleeping on it we found it to be quite hard. Like, seriously firm. I couldn't sleep in the bed during my pregnancies as it just killed my back & hips.

So about 3 months ago I asked if we could bring up our old, but comfy queen bed and take the king down. I pleaded with hubby that it was killing my back and that I'd rather sleep on the couch than in bed. He agreed to move it and ah.....the comfy queen was back in our room. I enjoyed sleeping more and found I didn't wake with such pains in my lower back as I had previously.

Come to find out, hubby really disliked the queen. He couldn't seem to notice a difference in comfiness (OK, this is amazing in itself!) and he really disliked the size. Apparently I get pretty cozy when I sleep and thus, take up however much room I feel like taking up and therefore, don't give him as much room. And the other thing is that we now 4 boys climbing up in bed with us and the queen did leave a lot to be desired in room for us all.

So, this week I agreed to change the beds BACK. We painstakingly set the queen up in the basement and brought the king back to our room. It's a beautiful bed. Rich dark cherry wood in a sleigh bed style. It sits so high off the ground I almost need a step stool to get in it. It's gorgeous. And it's still hard as a wood plank. Argh! It's only been 2 nights and I woke this morning in excruciating pain in my lower back. The kind when you move just so it catches your breath and you exhale an audible grunt. Yup, it's back and my back is suffering. What to do??? We are not in a position to pay for a brand new king mattress.

I've purchased MANY items hoping it would help but goodness, it's just SUPER firm. I've tried a feather bed on it, eggshells, memory foam, mattress pad and ALL of them together and it really doesn't help. How IS that possible? I think it's the 9th wonder of the world as how this bed can look so beautiful and be so uncomfortable.

So what's a girl to do? I can't function at 100% with a back that makes it hard to bend over or even shift my weight without causing me to make noise of pain. So my options are: a) endure & suffer; b) sleep in the basement on my queen bed; c) sleep on the couch; or d) sleep on the bottom bunk of my son's bunk beds.

Is a marriage in trouble if you don't share the same bed???? Will hubby agree to buy a new mattress if wife isn't in bed anymore???? Didn't those old shows like Leave It To Beaver have Ward & June in separate beds? Maybe we can make "dates" for "those" times and let me have my own bedroom in the basement for sleeping. Oy, who knew that a bed could cause so much distress!!!!!!

Cheese Nips, granola bars, frozen pancakes- OH MY!

I've had a few things that I continue to plague me regarding my life!

1. Become healthier by eating well & daily exercise.
2. Stop feeding my family processed foods.

I just HAVE to make exercising a daily part of my life. A priority! Like - doing laundry or making dinner. It's so easy to let that be the one thing that gets pushed to the side. I need to stop also stop eating my kids' leftovers or eating easy junk (goes with #2).

Let's see - I have a very nice treadmill & elliptical machine. My husband mounted a TV above them so we could watch it while working out. We have free weights, jump ropes, exercise balls and yoga mats. I have a Wii Fit, Jillian Michaels & the new Wii Active. I have a beautiful neighborhood and a bike. I have MANY different options!

I really hate the way I look, hate the way my clothes don't fit well and that I have to shop in the "plus" size all the time and that they just DON'T make the same cute styles - not even in workout clothes! Argh! And let's talk about the more serious aspect of it - my health! I have a family history of diabetes, heart disease and now cancer. I'm 35 and some days my body feels much older.

What's it going to take? I WANT to be one of those people that LOVE to exercise. I WANT to be one of those people that would choose a healthful dinner over a big cheeseburger & fries. Argh?!?!!? I'm always a bit envious of those people you see running - EVERY day.

O.K., so that's mostly about me. Now onto #2. It's sick when I go to the store and see all the processed foods that are being run across the beeper thing. Peanut butter crackers-beep. Trix cereal-beep. Frozen pancakes-beep. Cheese Nips-beep. Granola bars-beep. Diet soda-beep (this ones mine!). I could go on! It hit me last night as I was watching the checker and the items I had put up there, that 20 years ago people didn't have this many options for convenience foods and thus, MADE their own. It makes me quit ill to think of all the things that my kids are ingesting that they wouldn't if I made these things.

So - today is a new day. God's mercies are new every morning and I praise and thank Him for that. For me, today is a new day to make better choices and to THINK about my choices and the result of those choices. I want to treat my body as a temple, to love it and give it only good things and move it. I want to make better choices for my boys' little bodies by making not giving them so much processed/colored foods. THEY are worth it and so am I!

Here's to a day of good, healthy choices for my family!

One hand on her bump the other holding a ciggy

So, I went through the drive-thru to get an ice cream cone for the boys after our park play and had to pull over to wait. *go figure!* A nice looking young woman, I'm guessing her age to be about 21 or so, came outside and lit up a cigarette. When she sat down on the bench right in front of me, it was hard to ignore the fact that she was pregnant. Not like - wow, I'm a month along and don't know it yet and am doing things to endanger my unborn baby because I don't know anything yet. No -- a BIG, round, beautiful basketball of a belly just staring back at me.


It made me sick to my stomach, literally. I know that there are woman who do smoke during their pregnancies and birth healthy children with no concerns. I'm the product of one of those woman. I was a lucky one that didn't have smoke effect my breathing by being born predisposed to asthma or have allergies. Now, back in the 70's it wasn't really a concern and I think a lot of people were unaware of the effects of smoking or drinking during pregnancy could cause. But come on people. There are SO many warnings about someone smoking and ESPECIALLY during pregnancy.


I know I'm not supposed to judge. It's hard not too when you see someone having been blessed beyond measure with having a life grow inside of them....a heart, a brain, lungs, organs, tastebuds, eyelids, ears, etc. forming to become a new life and here this woman (and I'm sure, many others) who are choosing to play roulette with their choices. Well, it just really broke my heart. I didn't say anything and just smiled when she looked up at me. No matter the sin or the wrongdoing, love the person not the act. Though I have to admit, this was harder when it comes to someone (the mom) hurting someone else (the baby).

Reformed gypsy painting her teepee!

I'm doing it! I'm REALLY doing it. No, REALLY! I have lived in this house for 4.5 years and it's STARK white. I have wanted to add color but could never commit to what color. I mean, isn't it tough to take a 2x2 piece of cardboard with a color on it and imagine it all over the walls? OK, maybe not hard for someone with a degree in interior designs, or even someone with some skills in that area. Me? I change my mind with the wind - can't even begin to tell you how many times I've rearranged my furniture, etc.



A Freudian moment here. I think it goes back to my mom. Doesn't it always? In the first 18 years of my life, I lived in over 20 places. Apartments, homes, friends, etc. Not because we were a military family but because my mom was a single mother raising 2 girls on limited income and we rented. We were like gypsies in our small town, though not sure how many noticed or realized it. We never stayed in one place very long and I never got attached, maybe because we always stayed in the vicinity of our small town.



So, I think why I don't become attached to inanimate objects or homes is because of this. I also think it's why I change my mind all the time and have the ability to change without problem. Some people like my husband (or most people, maybe I'm really in the minority on this), who lived in the same house his whole life (and his parents still do after 50 years of marriage) and whose home looks the same with only minimal changes to it in that timeframe.



Ok, went off on a rabbit trail there......sorry! However, why I think I'm finally able to "commit" to color is that I am starting to feel like this is MY home. That I don't have to worry about moving next month or by the end of the year. I can put "roots" down here and color if I want. We own our home. We've been here over 4 years and this is the LONGEST I've lived in any ONE place my whole life!!!!! I praise God for my blessings!!!!



I went to Lowe's and looked through color swatches and picked a few. I think I just KNEW in my heart what I wanted because I brought them home and sure enough, they are perfect. I'm going to go get a small can to paint a poster board to get a feel for a bigger piece of it on the wall but I think it is what we're going with. Now is the hard part - when & doing it. Jim likes the colors, or at least, didn't balk at them. I think he's just thinking of the work to paint it (we have pretty tall ceilings and weird angles) but I can't wait!!!

You too can be a Pollyanna!

Woke to a cloudy, cold and wet day. And you know what? I am happy. Normally this kind of day had a way of giving me a sour attitude. However, I'm good. Why? Well, I'm learning that words shape my world. What I say DOES affect how my day will play out. I know it may sound trite or Pollyannish (you know that movie, right? The Glad game?) but seriously, Pollyanna was wise beyond her years.

So, if you say, "my kids are driving me crazy!" then you know what, they probably will as you are setting your mind on that path. If you say, "man, I feel grumpy," then you will be. Speaking of grumpy, not saying any of you reading this ARE *cough, cough* but when anyone in our house is acting grumpy we sing the grumpy song. Do you know it? It makes us smile. It's by Music for Aardvarks and is seen on Noggin. The lyrics:

If you wanna be a grump that's ok,
but could you be grumpy kind of further way?
It's not that I don't love you, `cause you know I do.
Sometimes I'm grumpy too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giTIlL_QAeM

So today? I challenge you to speak only positive words - especially in light of someone pulling in front of you on the road, the snotty bill collecter, your less than obedient children and to the spouse who has an attitude and is not attempting this and thus, being a stinker! :)~

Now, go have a great day!

No really, it's good!

Just had a delicious Lean Cuisine. Seriously, it was good. No really, I'm NOT just saying that. Sometimes for me, eating something easy like a microwave meal is just easier, especially after dealing with trying to figure out what to feed my 4 fickle boys.

"Mom, will you peel my grapes?" "I don't like PB&J" "I'm not hungry" "I want something else."

Not sure if it's boys or just toddler/preschoolers in general but man, they change with the wind. The power of the words is amazing even at this young age. If one doesn't like "it", then the other's don't like "it." Well, instead of becomming a short-order cook, I just try to pick something that will prayerfully appeal to all but if not, they can go hungry until the next meal. I know, I'm so mean. The meanest mom EVAH!!! :) Yeah right.

So anyway, back to moi. I joined weightwatcher's online almost 2 weeks ago and am finding lunch time is either a turkey sandwich or a lean cuisine-esque meal. It's just easier and when life is full of chaos, easier is a good thing. Even if it's NOT a big fat cheeseburger & fry. *lol*

Here I am....again....we'll see!

So, I saw a group of ladies who blog and have a site for bloggers. I really only "do" Facebook. But, I seem to say a lot.....so I started thinking that maybe I should blog and get my words out there that way instead. I had forgotten that I HAD signed up for a blog here and had a site already.....which is kind of nice, it saves me the hassle of signing up again.

Now that I'm back, I'll be posting about life in the fastlane of being a stay-at-home mom to 4 small boys and wife to a golf fanatic. I'll talk about all things - housework, friends, neverending battle of my bulge, my walk in faith and just the fun that is called my life!